We were young, dumb, and full of anticipation, in quest of the American Dream! Most of the Yahoos chose to attend college and/or serve in the military after high school. I chose my own adventure, fleeing the godforsaken hinterlands with my diploma, a particular set of skills, and a decade of experience in sales. Designing and selling t-shirts had taught me more than four years of fancy book learning. Now Captain of my own destiny, I charted a course back to Chicago.
Shenanigans ensued.
Success selling greeting cards door to door at the tender age of eight had sealed my fate. Live to sell! Sell to live! Sharing my goal to someday become a sales manager, my high school guidance counselor suggested HVAC repair ‘just in case that didn’t work out.’ Yikes! While sailing through life on sales skills alone had killed lesser men, selling had always been fun and easy for me, and it promised a life of adventure. With a heave and a ho, I set out, fueled only by my desire to parley.
Gigs with on-the-job training combined learning with earning and introduced me to life-changing gurus. Applying their lessons while pursuing my passions turned work into play. I even stumbled up into management more than once. On a dare from a client, I went into business as a marketing mercenary, finding success in several industries. Now, in the third half of my life, it is time to give back, so here's the best lesson I can share.
Think like a pirate. Have fun, be lazy, and cheat!
Like P. T. Barnum, I'm shamelessly giving away my autobiography, The Life and Times of Grizzled Adman. Shenanigans still include t-shirt sales. Who will help me launch a religion, revive a political party, or help stark, raving capitalists achieve their own American Dream? Life stories are written in real time today, so your collaboration is welcome on my next chapters. In the future, everybody will be famous for 15 megabytes.
